annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rubbish

1. I started laying bits of stuff on a board to make a new thing, but for it to work I need a bigger board. Everything here is off the beach, including the board, so I feel reluctant to buy a bigger one, but the deadline for submissions to the open house is fast approaching and I probably won't find one in time. I want to do a gradual change from natural beach things, like stones and pebbles, through wood, sea glass, metal, to plastic and the bottles. Pleased to still have those tiny vodka bottles - would have had three if Shirley hadn't eaten one... 


2. Didn't go to yoga. I couldn't face the cold and got myself in a state and forgot the talking to I usually give myself. Not the end of the world, to not do it, but feels like it. It does, somehow. It feels like a big disaster. I need to sit down and unpick why that is, but it's late already and here I am, meeting this commitment at least.


3. I took little Shirl to the sea glass beach - after all the anxiety about the cold, I went out into the wind, instead of scuttling about between big buildings, where it must have been warmer. There's often no one else there except a few ropey looking middle aged men, one at a time, just standing around. Are they sailors, in port (the harbour goes into a canal, parallel to and just behind the beach), bored, or too skint to go into town? Or is it another cottaging venue? I never used to notice that until my friend Nurse M told me about all the places he went, then I couldn't believe I hadn't spotted it. (That being a place men go to have sex with men they don't know)


4.  it was bloody lovely though, despite being fucking freezing.


5. I went to the care home after, and ED was in bed again. She doesn't want to get up. I like that they let her stay in bed if she wants to - at the other place they never asked her anything, just assumed she was virtually brain dead, got her up every day, at their convenience and sat her in the lounge in front of daytime telly. Sometimes I'd arrive at 2 in the afternoon, find her in bed and not know if they hadn't got her up yet or had already put her to bed. They only had one hoist for about ten residents. But I'm worried now about her not wanting to get up, day after day.

Take care xx

12:36 a.m. - 27.02.18

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next