annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary



  1. As I walked the four hundred yards round the corner to have my hair cut this morning, my legs seized up appallingly so I stopped fannying about and called the doctor. Had an appointment this afternoon, but we didn't get very far. Can you believe, my notes haven't arrived yet from my last doctor and it's nearly two fucking years I've been living here? So they don't have the scan or anything about me being diagnosed with PAD, or any of the info about my mental health history, or bloody anything, my entire medical history, lost in the system. Jeeeez. I think I saw something about transfer of records having been put out to tender and being bought up by G4S - (yes what a fuck-up. Anyway, the doc said my symptoms were unusual or some bloody thing but she wants me to have blood tests for cholesterol and another scan and meanwhile to not exert myself to the point of it hurting badly, in case there's a blockage and it bursts. Or something like that. I told her I can't not walk or I will go berserk, stuck indoors all day, so we agreed I can walk on level ground but to avoid uphill and probably not push the wheelchair. FFS.

  2. I applied for a volunteering post, mentoring young people, whatever they mean by that. The form was quite brief so I filled it in and sent it off, at which point I was invited to follow it up with my CV, but I don't have a CV and I'm too knackered to do one so que sera sera. I felt I deserved a pat on the back for doing anything as demanding as applying for a job, even if it is unpaid.

  3. At art group this morning I made a rainbow of rubbish:beachclean1 which I was not particularly pleased with as I'd hoped to do something more... I dunno, something more. But I fiddled about, moving pieces of plastic and seaglass and shells and stuff round and round for ages till I realised I was never going to be able to make a decision, and decided to do something with less choice, like a rainbow. It has made me think though, that next I want to do a longer piece, starting with natural elements like shells and pebbles, moving through wood, metal, sea glass into plastics. I need a bigger board though. I do like these pieces of worn board, with their soft edges and I like using only items from the beach. Apart from my glue gun, obvs.

  4. The haircut is OK, though she cut off all the scraggly ends so it's only just on my shoulders now, as opposed to reaching my waist at the back. Bloke didn't notice. I don't have a picture yet as when I click the thing on my phone to make it go the other way, for a selfie, it just goes black.

  5. I started the process to get a wheelchair accessible van for ED, using the mobility component of her disability living allowance. (I've been doing well by writing a little to-do list when I'm in bed at night, and seem to be cracking on through the tasks.) There's a local (ish) company that adapts vehicles, and the woman I spoke to said she has one that just needs blah blah blah (too mechanical, didn't listen) and she'll call me in the next day or two to arrange a time when she'll drive it to the care home and we can see if it suits. If it doesn't then blah blah blah - I didn't listen to that either.

I am grateful for: the nhs, hurrah for the nhs, still free, still there, just; my sis recommending this hairdresser - twelve quid it cost, nothing, and it's a good cut; M and J for agreeing to be referees for this post and for suggesting skills I have - I am a good listener, apparently - they don't know I'm going lalalalalala, not listening at all, though I do listen to them as they're my friends and I love them; my glue gun, I love my glue gun; Tuesday art group - very quiet again, peaceful and lovely

Sleep tight, dear friends, or have a good day if it's the morning when you read this, and thanks for reading

1:13 a.m. - 21.02.18


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