annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My heart's in the basement, my weekend's at an all-time low. Oh, I can't believe how I'm not writing here. Hope it doesn't last long. I've got 'The Old Grey Whistle Test - 70s Gold' playing while I'm writing. There will be clips. TOGWT was the one and only TV programme that played any non-chart music. Ah, look how lovely he was when he had to put a bit of effort in: So. I'm six nights drug free. Well, you know what I mean, drug-free apart from the marijuana and tobacco and caffeine. Oh, and alcohol - I've been having a beer with my dinner. It hasn't been the best week of my life, by some margin. Hardly slept at all. Good things have happened but I merely know them to be good, when I think about it. Rather than feeling them. 1. I've eaten 'proper dinners' six out of seven nights, baked (and eaten) a truly scrummy lemon drizzle cake and survived a three day event of marmalade making. And not let the washing up get out of control. 2. When we went to the allotment today, for the first time since the ground froze, we discovered that the sun is already back high enough in the sky to hit our plot. I did feel this one - man such a relief. The 'dark time' is only about four weeks either side of the winter equinox - utterly dispiriting at the time, to see sunlight on the surrounding hills but to be stuck in shadow. Over now till late November. Phew. 3. - hang on, we've got to Johnny Winter: He goes on a bit in the end - they did like their fucking guitar solos back then, didn't they? The first bit is fucking ace. Anyway 3. I went to the MIND (mental health charity) knitting group, in a bid to find fellow recoverers and hopefully someone to lark about with during the day. There was only one other 'service user' there, but she seemed pretty cool so I am not down-hearted. The facilitator is a proper knitter, which is more than I expected - I may return to knitting dogs, once I've finished the current hat. This is where I feel as if I've come from: 4. CBT is good. Much, much, much harder than I'd anticipated - a right fucking can of worms, but good. 5. CAB woman helped me fill in my first benefits form. Hateful to have to dwell on the realities of how bad things are, but all done now. The DLA isn't due till May so we're having a break before attempting that. I could have been Tina Weymouth Sweet dreams xxx 10:18 p.m. - 27.01.13 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||