annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thursday Today I was woken up by a text from an agent, about a massive flat at an affordable price, in that Crescent by the sea I've been tempted by before. I called them back at once - top floor. Fantastic views but no wheelchair access. Fuckers. Still, I seem to have passed some test that has moved me up as a prospective tenant and I've received a mind-boggling amount of texts, calls and emails today. The place I'm due to see tomorrow sounds perfect - big and reasonable, with a garden (called a garden not a patio), about 400yds walk from the beach. Rooms described as kitchen/diner and living room/diner, Victorian bay fronted, white painted. I'm allowing myself some tentative fantasies about loving it, securing it and moving in by Christmas. I can see meeting MG in the new Ikea on the coast to get some curtains, calling in on Stepfie on the way home... Actually that will probably stand wherever I move to - they tend not to come with curtains... Bloke's coming with me to view it. The agent called me this evening and asked if I'd change to a later time. No, I said, I think this is my flat and I want first look at it, all assertive like, so I'm going earlier. I called Bloke to tell him about the time change and he said not to get too optimistic, it probably won't suit, blah blah, avoid disappointment, hopes dashed etc etc. This reminds me why I don't live with him any more. I can live with disappointment - I feel a pang of regret then move on. If this isn't the one I may have a little bout of despair and frustration, but then I'll just keep on. I'm into a rhythm with it now, almost. I've given up trying to visit all the agents, but I look on the sites that trawl all the agents (then charge you 4p a minute to call), call the agents direct and sign up with all the new ones. I enjoy having these little visualisations of living in this street, or in that terrace. I enjoy believing things are possible. Sometimes they're not, but I've never been averse to a plan b. Better than expecting the worst all the time. I went and took some pics for my next painting, but the camera ran out of battery before I got to the pub I really want to draw. I've done some sketching of other bits and pieces from it this evening, but didn't have the oomph to get right into it. I'd had a visit from my friend J and her little dog that I used to walk. J has come to the end with her BF of three years and is quite sad about it, but also optimistic about a new life once he's gone. I kept my gob shut on the subject of what a knob I think he is, which was some feat when I went right off him a couple of years ago. She was a big part of my life when she was single and I do love her. Time will tell how close we become again - we're both teachers, both writers, both have 'challenging' adult kids and do just get along. She tried to keep me in her life when with the BF but was so obsessed with him that I grew weary of hearing about him and drifted away. Time for bed now. Grateful for everything - for a new stage of my life opening up in front of me, for those determined souls camping out in defence of our right not to be ripped off by rich arseholes in every area of our lives; for friends; for family; for little Bobcat on a cushion next to me, sleeping the sleep of the just. sweet dreams xx 10:40 p.m. - 03.11.11 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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