annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary

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Five things

1. I submitted five pieces to an art thing today - two photos and three paintings. You never know, do you? Can't win it if you ain't in it, all that kind of thing.

2. On we go, we are going onward, still living and breathing and putting one foot in front of the other, day after day after day.

3. Though truly, it's not all bad, but badness is the feeling that overwhelms me when I sit down to write. I live in the moment as much as I can, looking neither back nor forward beyond what's required, but every now and then I realise what's been occurring and it is a whole pile of stuff, too much of it featuring death, real, recent or imminent, gone for good, bloody death, the fucker. Not just being grumpy because they took off my favourite TV show and put poxy Autumnwatch on instead, though they did that too.

4. The worse it gets in Real Life, the more I cling to my Things That Help. I have walked at least 6,000 steps every day in October so far, I have been to every yoga, I have taken a photo-a-day if not twenty or thirty, I have painted and sang and visited my girl and held her hand and stared into her eyes and meditated and on we go, on we go.

5. It was only four things after all.

I am grateful for: friends, both here and in the world - I have been searching out the latter, in tiny steps; words and music and pictures and an open fire, flickering away; and you, dear reader. Sweet dreams xxx

12:20 a.m. - 25.10.16

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