annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary

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Not phantom

The last one of these, back to usual witterings forthwith

So I worked in that café, it was egg bacon and chips, that kind of thing, Round the corner were a load of arches under the railway line which had been made into workshops and groups of the blokes (it was all blokes) who worked there came in every day for a late breakfast then a sandwich in the afternoon. We had names for the different sets of them, this lot we called the breakfast boys, came in every day, each one had the same meal every day. They were ok, worked on cars. The boss, who worked alongside them, just as grubby as the rest, used to buy cars at the auction and clean them up, maybe mend them a bit then resell them at a significant profit. One of them would become my Sammie’s dad. He had sausage egg beans and chips in the morning, tea and a slice of bread and butter and in the afternoon tea and a bacon sandwich.
I didn’t know why I connected with him, he wasn’t good looking or friendly – if anything he was verging on rude, but he came in with all the others twice a day for two years and I developed a big crush on him. Daughter, with the wisdom of a failed marriage of her own, says when we’re fucked up we always connect with people that will enable us to carry on being fucked up in the same way – they match our pattern.
One day I turned up at work and the owners told us they’d sold it, that this would be the last day then it was being converted by the new owners into a Vietnamese restaurant. All I could think about was not seeing him again so I went straight round to the railway arches, told them what was going on and asked if he wanted to go on a date. He said yes. We went to a pub and had a meal, tournedos Rossini which he chose and considered very sophisticated. We went very quickly, too quickly, from there to sleeping together every night to living together to me getting pregnant. As noted, I’d been told I wouldn’t be able to have children and one of the customers in the café had had a phantom pregnancy so I assumed that’s what I was having.
Before I was pregnant a group of us got together to rent a house, right on the beach, the best house I ever lived in. Me and him, my sis and her BF, and a couple of other blokes, one of whom is still my pal though while we lived together he got right on my nerves. Sis and I used to have these awful fights, shouting not physical, but saying terrible things to each other at the top of our voices until we ran out of steam, when we’d laugh and say, “Pub?” and it was all over and we went to the pub. Till the next time. We haven’t done that since forever. We shared everything – everyone put a tenner a week into the kitty which paid for rent, a big food shop and the house hash stash, just a quarter of an ounce. We all cooked and cleaned and kept the whole thing pretty sweet, apart from me and sis shouting.

11:51 p.m. - 16.01.24

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