annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary
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Nogs and Hens and that
EMDR this morning. I can't remember the first bit but then J the therapist asked me quietly, "Before going back in, think, what do you need?" At which point, back we go and 'I' clambered into a big four poster bed and golden threads, wispy, smoky, soft, wove themselves all around it, creating a nest-like safe space. A character from Noggin The Nog, like this but a bit sketchier (that's Noggin himself and it was just a guard but I couldn't find one) was standing guard and when people came wanting me to do things, he told them that I was having a one hundred year sleep and wouldn't let anyone disturb me.
So that's the answer to what I need. One hundred years of sleep.
She asked if I was ready to finish and I said I wanted to go back one more time, though to be honest the words fell unbidden out of my mouth - I just wanted to go home and sleep. So we start the tapping again and I'm now a big red hen, much fatter than any hen you ever saw, and I'm - I'm not sure what the word is - am I as a chicken sat down? squatted down? Whatever, I'm not standing up, I'm resting and in among my feathers are all the tiny 'Little Annas' - me aged all the ages I have been, all the vulnerable, broken past Annas, tucked in safely, into my Healthy Adult, currently manifesting as a fucking chicken. Mother hen indeed.
11:48 p.m. - 29.11.23
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