annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary

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Meh

This is what I almost posted on facebook just now, but deleted at the last minute

I'm having a rubbish time this week. And it's only Tuesday. I may seem to be living the life fantastic, but actually I'm living as best I can with ongoing, chronic and severe anxiety and depression which, after all these years, I've learned how to manage with a range of activities and support. Then Easter comes along and most of it vanishes. No writing group, no acupuncture, no art at the museum, no choir. Meh.

I didn't put 'and all my favourite people are either away or looking after their grandchildren so what are the rest of you, that I quite like, up to?' Because I'm not completely mental. I'm trying to follow my therapist's advice and look after 'Little Anna' and see what she wants, but what she'd really like is someone to hang out with. We were meant to be doing EMDR tomorrow but rule one is that you have to be feeling on top of things so that's off. Probably not next week either, but who knows. 

On the plus side, I went and sat in the park - meant to be walking the dog but couldn't summon up the energy - and these two lads were kicking a ball around near me, near enough that I could hear their extended conversation about different brands of shampoo and conditioner, whether conditioner is worth it, the pros and cons of all in one. Bless them, they cheered me right up, if only briefly. 

There's a lot of stuff going on at the recovery centre I got chucked out of for no longer living in the right area. That doesn't help - our recovery centre here barely exists.

11:56 p.m. - 04.04.23

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