annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary

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Forgotten

I've spent most of today scrolling through old entries, mostly on random but sometimes following it through, like when Sam had kidney stones in September 2016 and it was awful for bloody ages. Here she'd just been discharged back to the care home. I quoted that thing about grief being like a storm at sea then:

That's how it is, with the waves now, man, sometimes I'm drowning with the loss of my girl, my precious darling daughter, but fucking hell, we ebb and flow like the most cuntish cunt in a land of fucking bastard cuntery. When she was in hospital, within the space of three days we had:
1. she's not going to make it through the day, gather together and prepare for her death
2. it was kidney stones and septicemia, we can cure those and she'll be far healthier than she has been for ages
3. He said what??? He shouldn't have said that - this has been major and will have big consequences for someone as frail as her, even if treatment is successful, which isn't certain by any means.

The worst thing is that I'd forgotten this. I remember her being in the hospice for end of life care then getting better, but that was spring '17, we'd already had this.

And I'm still standing, almost. Wordpress has gone down, which is unusual, it's usually here. Ah well. On we go, babes, on we go xx

12:32 a.m. - 19.08.22

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