annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Meh I don't really want to just come here every week or so and report that therapy is hard, but that's what will probably happen. Because it is. I want it to be easy, but it isn't. I'm finding the work incredibly difficult. To the point that I'm not doing it. Like self-soothing. She says to cross my arms and stroke my shoulders and upper arms, to soothe and comfort. You'd think that would be easy enough but it's not, it sets off alarm bells that drown out any comfort I might have found and I have to stop. Two seconds, maybe three, tops. I email and tell her. She says I'm doing great - if it had been easy I'd have done it years ago. But it sets me off. I went to London on Sunday, took Son back after he'd been down here for a couple of days, spent mostly with his pals. I stayed at his new flat, in a very swanky area, and we went to Tate Britain yesterday to see the Turner exhibition which was astonishing. It was all fab - spending time with him, especially, but today I'm done in. Didn't get dressed or put my teeth in till late afternoon. Have only walked 687 steps, apparently, or fuck all as it's also known. I didn't go to Tuesday art group. Tomorrow is my birthday and I haven't organised anything or reminded Bloke so he won't have remembered and I feel like it's the last fucking straw. 10:54 p.m. - 15.06.21 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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