annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary


Feeling ropey

I had the AstraZenica vaccine yesterday, which was all a bit of a mission. It was in the Brighton Centre - big, loads and loads of people, all managed really well, but weird. I was alone, fed into a well-spaced queue, with barriers and circles on the floor to step onto to keep us all apart, various check-in places, all in the big atrium and later the main hall, everyone in masks, many in uniforms, lots of big notices telling you what to do and not do. After a while (a very short while to be honest), I started to freak out. When I fetched up in front of a nurse who asked me questions about my medical history I said I have anxiety to the point that I attend a psychiatric recovery centre and I'm finding this here now very hard. As soon as I'd said it and she responded by taking it very seriously - asking would I feel better in a side room, finding an extra nurse to chat while I had the jab, I just calmed right down. We chatted about swimming in the sea nude - how do you meet someone and find out you both do that, in the first of the four minutes you spend together? When the jab was done they asked if I'd like a sticker - I said, "For being a brave girl?" They said yes and we all laughed.

I'd lost my ticket for the car park but I was so quick the guy remembered me and let my car through the barrier with no fuss, and I went off for a mooch about the place which was so what I needed. The city was empty - really empty, so weird to experience. The sea front is relatively busy which has led me to think that people weren't sticking to the lockdown, but they are - we're allowed a walk a day and the seafront is the place to go. Lovely to be there, but disconcerting. The numbers are good though, we're all under three figures - so under 100 new cases per 100,000 of the population in each of the local county areas, when it was up to 1,000 just a few weeks ago. So things are looking up.

Today though, I woke up feeling shit. Just wiped out, zero energy. I haven't got dressed all day,. had to miss my Tuesday art group and haven't walked or been outdoors at all. I did perk up a bit at dinner time and made some pancakes and some berry jam to have with them from frozen berries - utterly delicious but I ate two big fat ones, with all that and Greek yoghurt and bloody hell, I've had indigestion ever since.

Three Good Things
1. D from Glasto phoned and we had a long, lovely chat
2. I did the free yoga nidra from the natural health centre and although it was OK, it was also quite annoying. She spent too much time for my liking telling us we are all unique individuals, which I know and believe already, you don't need to persuade me, get on with it. So that's OK, I'm not fussed about missing art for it - I just won't bother.
3. I feel a bit safer, having had the vaccine and having a date for the second part. I know it's complicated and to be honest I'm not sure how safe I am from what, but I think I'm much less likely to get the virus so badly I need to be hospitalised or even die. I still don't feel that confident, but a bit better is something to be glad about


11:58 p.m. - 16.02.21


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