annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary


Jan 5th

Well. Here we are again. I'm still aghast at the political situation and horrified that our UK politicos are supporting US actions - clearly in breach of international law and then, threats issued on Twitter? It's a nightmare, isn't it, a real fucking nightmare where we're all hoping to wake up and it was all a dream. I used to tell my students off for having stories that ended with it all being a dream, but man, what would we give to wake up from this.

I went to Sunday yoga and had a massive coughing fit during the first relaxation at the beginning. I love how this teacher opens the class. He tells us to lie down and let our minds do what they want, to flit about worrying about the past and the future, all the things we have to do, the things we messed up. It's weird, because being told to do that generally clears my mind. Then we do some breathing exercises and by then we've all 'arrived' and we're away. But today I coughed like a motherfucker and for some reason, instead of going outside and coming back when it had passed, I grabbed my glasses and water bottle and left. Put my boots on and came home. Regretted it about half way along the bypass - I mean, what the fuck? I'd driven all the way over there and left without doing bloody anything. Still, if I was bound to do something rash and impulsive today, this was pretty harmless.

I had a text from N, the ex-care-home manager, which made it clear that we'd arranged to meet up today - I only had to scroll back through our messages to see that this was the case, but I'd totally forgotten. I took the dog, parked way down the beach and walked to hers. Really good. We're becoming proper mates in our own right, not just two people who loved my daughter.

After which I came home and tidied my bedroom, which had arrived at peak shit-hole. Clean sheets and all. Wiping. Even took the curtains down to be washed, putting up the shocking pink ones from Sam's room for the meantime - a bit alarming - don't know what they'll be like in daylight


Colour is a bastard, isn't it - those walls are quite a deep sage green.

Today I am grateful for:

  1. Being able to do the task for #64millionartists which I hadn't been able to yesterday

  2. Finding some bacon in the fridge and having it for breakfast

  3. Finding a parking spot outside the yoga studio straight away

  4. Managing not to give myself too much of a hard time for leaving yoga like that

  5. Not coughing much for the rest of the day

  6. Hitting the pier at the exact same time as the starlings, though these ones don't fly in formation like the ones down the road  10ED5A3A-73A2-4E66-97EE-D43EF01458C7

  7. The rain stopping while I was walking

  8. The wind being very mild

  9. Having a great time with N - she's able to be much more honest now we don't have a professional relationship

  10. Making a beef in beer stew type thing without a recipe and without getting into any kind of agitation over any part of it. And it was delicious.

  11. And there's enough left for two more days - we had it with mixed mash tonight (potatoes and parsnips) and veg, tomorrow it will be with jacket spuds and veg, and I'll do enough spuds tomorrow to make a shepherd's pie out of the last bit. (OK. cottage pie.)

  12. I managed to get Bloke to help put together a menu for the week, which he hates but I like. He prefers to go food shopping everyday, but doesn't do it till late and it all makes me very anxious and I can do anxious on my own, without any help from him

  13. Clean bed

  14. Tidy bedroom

  15. Feeling ok


Night night xxx

12:17 a.m. - 06.01.20


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