annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Late Five

1. I've had a really sociable week which I must remember when I next feel isolated and lonely - though that's not how it works, is it? Last Sunday I spent with J, my writing buddy, the one whose dog I used to walk. We talked non-stop for about eight hours, about life, the universe and everything, totally brilliant. On Monday it was my friend M, the one who had cancer and has recently had another lump which turned out to be a cyst, thank fuck. Walking in the wind, again, talking and listening like there's no tomorrow. Wednesday was special as my friend L travelled down from Sheffield to meet me before she goes back to live in Chile. We've only met once before, but we read each other's blogs and when we do meet it conforms that yes, these are real friendships, and yes, we do know each other. I took her, and her delightful husband, to the seaglass beach (which, sadly, had been cleaned out by Tina earlier that day), then for miles along the lower prom - in retrospect too far for a pair of indoor academics, but too late, and we all survived. I feel very forlorn at the thought of her being across the ocean again, which is mad as it won't make any difference, and pissed off that I never made it to Sheffield, but there's still a few weeks for the train fare to fall into my life...


2. Today my Younger Daughter and I went to Virginia Woolf's house, which is now owned by the National Trust, and full of posh people in casual clothes, which does bring out the sweary, uncouth side of me, but not too much. I haven't been to many author's houses, just the Brontes' and here (I think), so I'm still enthralled by the very idea of being in the writing room where she wrote 'A Room of One's Own'. We had a great time, me and my girl lots of laughing and foolishness and then a big dinner.


3. I've been doing an all-out healing myself programme - Floradix tonic, Vitamin D, Brewers Yeast, turmeric, qi gong, yoga, acupuncture, rest and self care, and it's finally working - yay. On Wednesday we walked five miles and I didn't feel any different to how I used to, and didn't even notice as I was all caught up in being with L, until we got to the long hill up to the station, so I am declaring myself properly on the mend.  I want to take up the walking again, the 1000 miles in a year - I found there's an app on my phone that has been keeping track of how far I've walked, though I can't find a way of getting the total so far this year. I'm going to work it out myself - though there's such scope for error. But hey, it'll be close enough.


4. I still haven't got my words ready for the Free Read by the Literary Consultancy. I spent weeks just reading - there's far too much there - and now I haven't been able to motivate myself to knuckle down and do it. I think it's because it's about the mental health shit when it was really bad, and I've just had another plummet into the Pit of Despair as I used to call it. I don't think they were connected - the reading and the return to the pit - it's more likely my self-destruct button going off, and thwarting my plans for fame and fortune, but I am going to DO IT, starting tomorrow. An hour a day minimum. The date it's due keeps going back as it's all via the voluntary sector, so chaotic. I'm getting it free as I'm classed as disadvantaged, due to mental health, but it's all been very stressful in itself.


5. Politics. Fuck. Ing. Hell. You don't need to hear it from me - you know. Just want it noted that I see this shit, I don't know what to do, but I do care, I'm not oblivious.

1:11 a.m. - 12.08.19

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next