annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary

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Sunday morning

1. I thought I'd try taking a notebook somewhere else to write as I hate this fucking house so much, and this fucking village and all the uptight, right-wing people who live in it, so it's no wonder I'm always pissed off when I write. But I don't like carrying stuff around, I like being hands free. Maybe tho...


2. Yesterday I took a stack of chairs back to my friend J the muso. She loaned them to us when ED was in her second 'end of life' phase and the hospice said she wouldn't survive the ride from the care home to the hospice, so she should stay in her own room. I borrowed the chairs for the visitors, who never actually came. They were all done, exhausted by the horror of saying goodbye once to a dying young person they loved, and it was only me in the end, sat with her, watching her breath slow and slow and slow then pick up again. This time last year. It took me this long to take the chairs back as I didn't want to 'jinx' it.


3. J the muso's parents died very suddenly and close together and left her a massive amount of money. She bought a beautiful wreck of a house which she has now finished doing up. It is very lovely, no tasteful expense spared, but I still don't care that much. She wanted to show me round and point things out and I just wanted to sit and chat. I never did get to ask if she has any new music coming along.


4. And back to the beach, the beautiful, hypnotic, endlessly changing, fascinating beach. I talk to myself when I'm there, out loud. And make up songs about sea glass to the tune of the last song playing on the car radio. And generally feel dangerously mental.


5. I'm going to collect an echium now - a mad plant that grows fifteen foot tall in a summer, flowers from top to bottom, attracting 1000s of bees and generating masses of seedling for the next year. But the frost killed them all this year - I'm lucky to have found one

Back later - have a good Sunday dear peeps xxx

11:47 a.m. - 15.04.18

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