annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary



Letter to ED's care team, the one we managed to get rid of eventually:

Dear Mr D,
My daughter, ED, was recently on the receiving end of your “care” until we were able to change back to the previous team and I want to make sure you understand why we had to change.
ED (34) has Multiple Sclerosis and until this recent severe episode was a bright, ambitious young woman with much to look forward to. Over a very short space of time she lost the ability to walk unaided or to control her bladder and has also suffered severe memory loss and loss of cognition. As her partner is self employed and has to work long hours she has to rely on carers to help her get washed and dressed in the mornings and with toilet breaks at lunchtime and early evening. As I am sure you can imagine, this has been devastating and I am afraid your team made it much much worse.
The main culprit was a woman named D, whose surname I don’t know, but I am sure you can identify from your records – ED lives in XXX. I visit her as often as I can and have witnessed the following inappropriate actions on a regular basis:
• Laughing at ED’s disabilities ie her faulty memory, her lack of bladder control, the tremors in her arms that cause her to spill drinks etc. I don’t believe this was done with the intent to distress ED – D probably thought it was lightening the mood, but it really and truly wasn’t. This kind of talk might become acceptable once a close relationship has been formed with a client, when they have come to terms with their situation, but neither of these were the case and ED found it utterly humiliating and very distressing.
• The basic tasks of maintaining ED’s personal cleanliness was not carried out. When I arrived for a visit she was usually dirty, visibly so. Her hair was regularly left unwashed for over a week and she was dressed in dirty, unwashed clothes that smelt of urine. After the one occasion when ED didn’t have any upper body strength, D refused to give her a shower, despite the return of upper body control and a shower seat which the current carers are able to use without problem This is a two person task and not one that her partner can manage alone so she went for months and months without a shower
• Continuing a conversation with the other carer over ED’s head while carrying out personal tasks, ignoring her completely. I witnessed this a couple of times when they were unaware of my presence – coming into her home mid-chat, going into the bedroom and starting to undress her without even acknowledging her, just talking over her head. This is DISGRACEFUL behaviour.
• Always making themselves a cup of tea and sitting down to drink it, watching TV or chatting together for five or ten minutes, even on the lunch and afternoon short visits.

My purpose in writing to you is to try and prevent other vulnerable people from having to endure the humiliation of being treated in this way. ED was scared of D, dreaded her visits but didn’t want us to talk to her about this behaviour for fear of further unpleasantness when she was alone. At the very least D requires retraining in how to approach her clients. The knowledge that she is training others appals me.

Yours sincerely

blah blah blah

11:44 a.m. - 06.06.13


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