annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- you never do what you know you oughta Gah! Bloody clocks have gone forward and thrown me right out. I am in despair about the corruption and cynicism of our government. Sometimes I get frightened about how poor they're prepared to let us be, us common people. We have absolutely no power or representation - apparently the number of millionaires in the Cabinet is now up to twenty-four out of twenty-eight - and they really don't give a shit - they're just looking after their own and could be up for letting us get cold and hungry, like proper poor people. Another good but exhausting day with ED and Grandson, who have now gone home. Bloke provided sterling support, thank god. It's the being in charge that kills me, the decision making. What to eat and when loom with the import of life and death, especially as GS is picky as fuck (and actually looks malnourished), and she is gluten-free, which isn't really that much of an issue until I start losing the plot. She's done well on that diet - she started it at half term, about four or five weeks ago, and is noticeably freer in her movements and perkier in herself. I give myself such a hard time about the whole benefits/fitness thing (I may not sound as if I do, but that whole Daily Mail benefit scroungers schtick has put down roots in my head - it used to be the position of the ultra hard right, but now it's mainstream and it eats at me), but weekends like this, when I cannot function properly even when I am desperate to do so remind me that actually, I am still unwell. I yearn to drift about for a while in the wake of someone benignly decisive. That would be so brilliant. I've signed up to do this mindfulness thing tomorrow. Bed now. Grateful for: a day in the sunshine with my darlings; how peaceful it was with just the three of us (me, ED and GS); having my garden quite sorted; seeing a lot of S and M, the darlings; David Bowie. Sweet dreams xxx 12:24 a.m. - 26.03.12 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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