annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary


Whoa-oh how the life goes on

Well, that's better, isn't it? I liked the pic of the wave crashing because it was taken on an exhilaratingly windy day, but it was kind of depressing.

YD has gone home, which is good, or it will be when she actually arrives. Just had a call from her - she's taken all my Amy Bloom books, having read one of them while here, was so engrossed she missed her stop and is currently reading on a railway station platform somewhere in south east London. There's a train at 00.30 to a place where she thinks she'll be able to get a bus. Sigh. [Update - there wasn't a bus so she had to take a cab - 17, but she's home now]

The situation with ED is deteriorating, in a terrible circle of stress and fatigue causing severe cognition problems which result in her missing appointments or turning up and forgetting why she's there and saying she's fine, so she's not getting any help with the stress and fatigue, which are also having a huge negative impact on her family life which stresses her out even more. SIL has finally come out as anti-notbob - hates having me there. I cannot swear that I have behaved as well as I might have done - I think I have but I've been wrong about such things before. I am stepping back - god even as I write that I question it. I am aware of (and try to restrain) my tendency to want to 'rescue' people, which is not the same as supporting them and results in shitloads of unsolicited advice, but I also feel there's no one else looking out for ED. It's all far, far too hard. But at least she has a big, fat, mouse-catching ginger cat who loves her to death:

and is pretty good at squeezing himself into small spaces without knocking things over, n'est-ce pas?

Art class today - pen and wash, but only pen today. In retrospect, I can see that I was pretty uptight:

It's not like me to make such small pictures - I didn't think of it till YD pointed it out, but bloody hell, shells in out first class. They are so difficult. I tried it from several different angles, but I was all stiff and trying too hard, until I gave up and had a go at things other people were working on. I think I was finding my feet a bit with the starfish and then the class finished. I'll try again tomorrow with some of the shells and pebbles I have kicking around the place - I can never quite manage to go to the beach without bringing something back so there's plenty to hand.

First job though, is the bloody h ousing b enefit bollocksy shite that I have to sort out by Friday. I have to somehow convince them that they should pay my rent instead of demanding that I get Son to return the money I gave him to finish his education. Wish me luck.

Grateful for: an empty, peaceful house; having "Submarine" to watch tomorrow; fish fingers for tea - cheap, easy, fairly nutritious and not too vile; long phone call with M; having my pc back so that the bloody Bob can sit on it while I'm writing instead of trying to sit on my lap/the keyboard:

Sweet dreams xx

12:14 a.m. - 21.09.11


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