annanotbob2's Diaryland Diary

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Quick, quick


  1. I have a new laptop with the keyboard set further back, making it very uncomfortable to type. Maybe I need a new chair, as the height of this one is a factor in the discomfort, but that seems madness. All my chairs and tables are the same height, so moving around won't help.

  2.  Daughter's scan revealed a serious absence of kidney stones, to the amazement of all concerned. We have an appt on Thursday to discuss this with the urologist. I've been very emotional, not always in a good way. Full of delight and admiration of her sheer will-power/desire to live, for a while, but then deflated by the fact that she still can't move or speak, just isn't likely to be dying any time soon - it's hard to explain this without it sounding like I either don't care, or wish she was dying but it's neither of those things. I just caught myself celebrating and then remembered reality.

  3. I finished doing my chair, but don't like it that much. It was meant to be more orange on the paintwork - shabby chic or some such bollockry, but when I tried to sand it down it went straight down to the wood, taking the orange paint off as well. And the grey paint looks purple, which I don't like either. Yeah, still grumpy.


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4. It was Son's birthday yesterday so he came down and we went for lunch and coffee and shit. He is a great solace.

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I made him an OM as part of his present, all very last minute so had to put it on the radiator to dry so I could wrap it up, which pissed Bob off, as she sits there.

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5. I fucked up the job application to work as a peer trainer at the recovery centre and didn't get an interview. I left it right to the very last minute as I have been overwhelmed with police stuff about ED's benefits and all that, and managed to miss the fucking person spec, mistaking the general intro for the spec itself. I also didn't check that my teaching qualification and experience had actually uploaded into the box - it didn't. When I called for feedback they were very nice and encouraged me to try again next time they're advertising but to get someone to check it through - honestly, I was so fucking pissed off - we are majorly skint again - I need a bloody job and I'd much rather work for a mental health organisation where 'lived experience of mental ill health' is a job requirement than a place where I have to try and pretend it never happened.

6. Still walking lots, up and over the hills, away from the roads

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with the naughty puppy, seen here gazing wistfully out to sea:

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Laters. I am grateful for: having a dog; an open fire; a warm bed; a son who wants to spend at least part of his birthday with me; a new laptop, even if it has pushed us into financial despair

12:39 a.m. - 29.11.17

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